|Banky: policemen (London)|
Yo, K, I just came out to my Palestinian/Syrian dad living in Canada a couple of months ago. It was difficult, full of contradictions. And i'm still living the shock resulting from it. I haven't had a conversation with him that's more than "hi, how are you." since i told him. Like you, i'm not OK with the way casual sex is, in a way, shoved down our throats (no pun intended), although i have a many friends who enjoy it. It's ok to have those different contradictions. The most important thing is that we're aware of them and try to resolve them.
Great post ! To this anonymous writer from another anonymous writer... If there is a reason why gays would ever want to change, its not because of us being gay- its because society is still learning to understand and accept us. We are living in a historical and changing time period. But if society accepted us just like they do heterosexuals, i highly doubt anyone would ever think of changing. The love and intimacy that two guys share is beyond words, but if i have to think of a word to describe it, it would be "phenomenal".
That alone would never make me want to change to please others- that fact that it feels so right and natural. I'm a 100 % Lebanese, happily married(to a guy) . We have a child together and my Lebanese parents and cousins all know and love me unconditionally. My Husband, son and I attend church regularly and the pastor loves and respects us as we are. We live our lives very normally and rarely ever encounter prejudiced or discrimination. We enjoy being an pioneers in our community and braking barriers for the younger LGBT generation who needs good role models. I pray that you can find some inner peace and love and acceptance.
|In Pride we Trust|
If I may, there are a couple assumptions here that aren't shared by the entire gay community. For example, I didn't start understanding I was gay until much later in my life, thinking that my attraction to men was simply because of the lack of women in my life (I lived in Syria, where gender segregation was more popular). Once I moved to Lebanon, and a short trip to England later, I realized I could have access to all the women in the world, and it wasn't going to change what I wanted.
Never did it cross my mind, though, that there was something wrong with me. I understood quickly that there was prejudice against who I was, but I didn't think that who I was was particularly wrong or vile - I thought other people were prejudiced. Reconciling my faith and my identity were harder, but somehow being biologically who I am just didn't seem so wrong to me.
Which brings us to the pill question: No. Even after thought, even after realizing that I'd have to work harder and live in the periphery, I don't want a pill that would change me. I'd be far more frightened of anything that would so fundamentally change me than anything anyone can throw at me. Literally - I fear not being myself more than losing my life. This isn't to say that your experience isn't legitimate or that others don't experience what you experience.
It's just too kind of offset the assumption that we ALL feel that way. As for telling parents and stuff, that is more along the lines of not hurting them rather than not being comfortable with who we are. I also hide that I drink and eat pork, and have occasionally smoked stuff that wasn't tobacco. That's not about being ashamed of that as much as I know my parents would really, really not like it.